(blŏg) n. A weblog; intr.v. blogged, blog•ging, blogs To write entries in, add material to, or maintain a weblog.(1)

Four letters. One word. Who would guess it could instill such fear in me? But it does. Why? Because I don’t blog.

I’m sure the above statement will ensure a few raised eyebrows, some gasps, maybe even a question or two on how in the world one could call oneself a writer yet not blog. Friends say it’s only a matter of time before I start blogging. Others chuckle knowing that, as an officer of HIS Writers, I am now required to blog on this site. Monthly.

Oh joy.

My fear of blogging is an oddity, considering I’m secretary for ACFW Denver’s HIS Writers and have been since 2006. It’s an oddity because I like taking notes, I like writing, and I LOVE computers and cyberspace. Even keep a journal. So why then do I look at blogging like a trip to the dentist?

Thinking doing a little research on blogs might help me get to the root of this fear, I started with the world’s most “reliable” source—Wikipedia—and moved on from there. This is what I found:

•Online diaries (pre-blogs) became popular shortly after the World Wide Web hit the consumer scene in the early 1990s.

•By the mid 90s, a number of servers offered “homepages” to their subscribers. These homepages allowed consumers to post tidbits about family life, personal interests, etc.

•Then in the late 90s (December 17, 1997, to be exact), Jorn Barger of Robot Wisdom coined the term “weblog” to describe the daily list of links that logged his travels across the web.

•Shortly thereafter, the “we” was dropped and word “blog” evolved.

Needless to say, although I found the above facts interesting, my fear of blogging still remained.

Double joy.

Maybe I’m afraid of being transparent. Maybe I’m concerned that, by blogging, I will find out my life isn’t nearly as interesting as I thought it was. Or maybe…just maybe…it’s a deeper, much deeper, issue I have with the Lord.

When God called me to write back in 1998, I didn’t want to. I was not one of those women who had dreamed of writing my whole life. Sure, I enjoyed it. I had written a number of songs and poems over my lifetime—even mentally jotted down a handful of bedtime stories that I read to my children. But writing was something “fun” done during my leisure—not a goal or dream. So it was a shock when “the call” came.

Not only did the Lord call me to write, but three years later He handed me a specific project—an ENORMOUS project—gave me the plotline, along with a thimble full of characters, then said, “Write, Jill, for such a time as this…”

Unqualified and unmotivated, I did what every good Moses archetype would do: I fled.

Running from God is a funny thing. No matter how far you run or how deep you hide or how many “not me, Lord” excuses you come up with, He is always there—patiently waiting when you return home. So after a year of desert walking (and running and hiding), I realized God was not going to let up. He gave me this task regardless how long it would take, and told me I was the one responsible for completing it—I was the one whose hands would be bloodied by the souls of those who missed redemption due to my disobedience. The ones Providence called to read the books I was to write that had not been written.

“Apprentice yourself,” He said.

So in the winter of 2001, I did.

* * * * * * * *

Since there is much more to this story than I have time to share right now, I think I’ll save it for next month. At least then I’ll have something to blog about. And who knows? If I get wordy enough I might even try to stretch the story into a third month. Ha! Wouldn’t that be a hoot? A blog-a-phobic actually blogging! In the meantime, I will leave you with two things I keep on my PC desktop at home: a quote from Elizabeth Eliot and a verse from the Bible. May they give you hope, boost your faith, and help keep your eye on God’s goal as they have done for me.

Love you guys!
Jill

“The job has been given to me to do.
Therefore it is a gift.
Therefore it is a privilege.
Therefore it is an offering I may make to God.
Therefore it is to be done gladly, if it is done for Him.
Therefore it is the route to sanctity.
Here, not somewhere else, I may learn God’s way.
In this job, not in some other, God looks for faithfulness.
The discipline of this job is, in fact,
the chisel God has chosen to shape me with—
into the image of Christ.” –Elizabeth Eliot

“When you bow down before the Lord, and admit your dependence on Him,
He will lift you up and give you honor.” –James 4:10

* * * * * * * *
(1)”blog.” The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition. Houghton Mifflin Company, 2004. 14 Jan. 2009. [Dictionary.com http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/blog%5D.

(2)Barger, Jorn. “Top 10 Tips for New Bloggers From Original Blogger Jorn Barger.” Wired. 15 Dec. 2007. 14 Jan. 2009. [http://www.wired.com/culture/lifestyle/news/2007/12/blog_advice].

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